Lucky Baby Oil

When Chris Kaman get's out of the shower, he doesn't reach for a towel. He lets the moisture evaporate off of his muscular physique. He allows the cool breeze emitted from the mouths of the strippers he slept with the night before to augment the evaporation process as they whisper sweet nothings inches away from his body. It's rather sad, one could say, to watch each droplet dissapear, seeing it passionately cling to Christopher's deeply-pigmented skin as it attempts to savor every moment it exists on his flawless frame.
He stays nude for most of the day, attended to by Phillipino women who rub him down with his fine collection of baby oils. Often times, Christopher takes off his clothes when he has company, just to lay to rest any rumors that he does not have the biggest penis in the world. Chris Kaman's nudity and its effect on the heterosexual male is breathtaking. It is physically impossible not to be attracted to Chris Kaman and it is a testament to Christopher's will-power, gentleness, and self-defense that he has at times in his life been seen not having sex with people.